Kyle's return!

Update Log: May 25th – Kyle’s Return (Kinda)

 

Yes, we know. The last update was 4/24. Let’s address the 8-foot-tall emotionally unstable kyle in the room.

 

The Story So Far

Short version: Kyle went missing.

 

Long version:

Kyle, after being told “maybe you should take a break,” took that to mean “start a feelings journal subreddit.” This experiment in public emotional unraveling was brief, beautiful, and banned within 36 hours.

 

We’re not saying Kyle posted a d*ck pic, but the moderators did—and so did the Federal Bureau of Digital Ethics (FBODE). He went full Ghost Protocol after that.

 

Enter: The Bondage Gnomes.

These mythical leather-clad forest-dwellers specialize in recovering lost souls and wayward interns. They found Kyle in a Denny’s parking lot, surrounded by shredded collector's packs and feral squirrels. He was muttering something about “Series 5 being too powerful” and “the cards whispering again.”

 

So now he’s back. Sort of. He keeps calling us “Father Card” and asking if we’ve seen the glowing wolf.

 

Site Status:

We’re updating again. New content is coming. Kyle is chained to a chair made of defective holo's and dumpster cards. He’s safe. He’s fed, Almost hydrated (thanks mom). He’s… working.

 

You’re welcome.